Life's tests

Do you know that life will give you a test that will gets harder and harder along the way?

When you had accomplished one test, you will be able to handle it in case it comes back. So the second time the test comes back, it is not a test for you anymore. Because it's easy for you to get through it. A test is when you find it hard to stand up and sometimes you may feel like giving up.

So, eventually you will get a harder test, which means, you're 'UP' one level. You'll realized that the test is so hard which somewhat impossible to be existed, but it did. And it's there for you to solve it. If you think that it's so hard, take a minute to look back in the past. Recall everything you've been through. Then you'll realized that you've been through a lot, which proves that you're strong enough to handle another test.

And yes, now I'm in the middle of a hard test. I have to step back from something and someone I like, when 'that things' are keep on coming at me. This will not be hard when I don't like it, so it's easy for me to step back. Or even when I like it, but it doesn't like me back, it's also easy to look forward and forget about it. 

But now, when I want to look away, it always coming back at me, makes me weak and holding me from stepping back. I know I need to be strong to fight with my own feelings, which is not easy at all. I am trying to always keep my faith, be patient and pray :). Hopefully I can hang on until it's done.

'Things will be perfect at a perfect time'

Ever heard that notion? or not exactly like that but has the same meaning. I guess everybody ever heard it before. This words - or you can call it quotes - are used to motivate people when bad things are happening to them. It gives them the strength to let go and wish that there are something better for them in the near future.

I don't know if it works, but sometimes it does works for me. It makes me stop worrying and keep positive about what's happening. And actually here, I want to share that, this quote is really true.

It started when I was in my last year of primary school. I wish two things about how my junior high school life would be: part of an organization, and/or part of a dance club. Well, things turned out differently. There are no dance club and I didn't have a chance to be in an organization, because the teacher should recommend you to get in the organization. So then I let go of my dream and pass it for the senior high school. I wasn't mad, I enjoyed myself learning until I got top position in class.

In senior high school, I moved to Hong Kong. So instead of join any extracurricular activities, I learn my ass off to adapt and graduate in one and a half year. Again, I pass my dream to college.

I was putting a high expectation into college life. Since I'm back into my home town, so no adaption needed and college students are mature enough to make decision about organization. So I expected to have a high chance of making a dream come true. But life does not always giving what you want. The selection to be in an organization is that you need to join a-3-days-2 nights-outside-the-campus- camp. Since in Indonesia is not that safe, I'm a girl and there are no teacher supervising the camp, I'm not allowed to go, which means I'm not be able to join the organization. The same thing happens for the dance club. Life's bitter, I know. And I was thinking that life's not fair. I was kinda mad and blaming the situation, because I was thinking that college is my last chance to make it all happen.

Life is unpredictable, I would say. My plans for getting my master degree was changed, from getting it in Jakarta to Taipei. And surprisingly, in the place where I study now (NTUST) has lots and lots of Indonesian people, which makes it possible to form an Indonesian Student Association (ISA). There's no specific requirement to be a member, so I join it directly, without hesitation. Another blessing is that I was offered to dance Saman. And there are a lot of performing, which I - of course - really enjoyed it.

Now, in my second year, I'm a secretary in NTUST-ISA, a legislative board of ISA in Taiwan and a coordinator of Saman dance club. There goes my dream come true. I'll never imagine any other possible situation that is better that this. I really thank God for all these opportunities and I won't take any of these for granted.

See? It's really happening. As long as you keep trying and not wasting any chances you've got, things will be really perfect at a perfect time.